Eyeballs for Sex's Sake!

September 20, 2017

Hola Bitcholas,

Today we talked about death. We talked about poop yesterday, so why not death today?

I'm not gonna go through all the different answers we heard today, but I wanna take this opportunity to express the "power of attraction". Case-in-point, a guy called in who used to be a security guard at a hospital. One of his duties included admitting employees into the morgue. One particular night, a female employee who he described as "incredibly hot" needed into the morgue. He was so attracted to her that he asked if he could stick around while she did whatever she needed to do. She was there to HARVEST EYEBALLS from a corpse. She was attractive enough that he decided, "f**k it, I'll hang".  

There are beautiful people in the world, but none of you are SO beautiful that I would willingly watch you extract eyeballs from a dead person. I don't want you to take it personally, but f**k that.  

So, the security guard went into the morgue, still trying to kick game with eyeball poacher. He was good up until she asked for his help. No, she didn't need his assistance for the actual extraction of the eyeballs, she just wanted him to hold the corpses head. He made the effort (again, because he wanted to get into her pants) but once he felt the hair of the dead man, he just couldn't do it...so he excused himself.

I get it. I wouldn't have hung out even THAT long once she brought up the whole "I need slick's eyeballs" thing...but whoever she is, I hope she has some idea of how gorgeous she must be. Or how desperate the caller was for some ass.  

Anyway, that's the memory I'll be taking with me.  


I'm outta here. Until tomorrow, do what you do best and STAY BEAUTIFUL!