The Human Chainsaw Overshare

December 13, 2017

Hola Bitcholas,

Had another one of those days where random comments just kinda made scratch my head and ask, 'why do we cross people's minds at these moments?'

We appreciate that we, somehow, are in your hearts and minds at odd times. That's quite flattering. It really is...but you don't always need to share. Sometimes you just don't need to. I mean, do you want your wife to tell you that she's picturing Brad Pitt when you have sex? No. No you don't. And you're not gonna tell HER that you're picturing Kate Upton.

Ah, so here's one comment that came in:

"What do you guys know about anal beads?....I had a chick grab a hold of them and yank on it like I was a chainsaw with old gas. Paralyzed for 15 minutes"

Yeah, I'm not sure why WE the 'trusted' source on this, but that was a comment. Sadly, I never got back to the guy because, honestly, I don't know much about anal beads. Call me a prude. However, the one I HAVE heard is that you don't just rip those mofos out of your backside. Guess this guy learned that.  

A little later, this text came in:

"Somebody left me a not so nice fart in the elevator. Just thought you should know."

I don't necessarily agree that we SHOULD know, but, again, thanks for keeping us in your thoughts.

To be fair, I'm an avid fan of farting in elevators for the next person. YeaH, I know, I know, I'm too old to be doing sh*t like that, but I love it too much to stop. I've always been pretty open about that so maybe THAT'S why he wanted to tell me?  

I just don't know.  

That's what I've got for you today.

Until tomorrw, do what you do best and STAY BEAUTIFUL!