Jim Norton 09-22-17

Friday, September 22nd

Jim Norton joins us live in studio promoting his stand up at The Neptune Theatre.


Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

You know implementing a next guest on the dimension tonight memo does Netflix special mount food chain so fond of with your friends. I walked into a public restroom anybody in my I was at the Jarno. Do some things when your friends of the early just got to know them a little bit. So even walk inside snuck up behind him very very quietly and I said about an inch behind him. And I put my mouth right behind his neck hair and and I just went hand. And he freaked out. And it wasn't my friend. Please welcome Melissa Jones are man GM hey listen to myself yes and headphones off the coast Montel we have Bobby lea and and we did some might that he through the headphones down and sort of yelling housing OK crap never gonna do not against him and no matter what you do not believe the same guys. So who I play him because he's I was shooting big comedy cellar spun out by the comedy story daylight Polly odds and I just saw Bob really. Well the nice guy Bobby is just a strange little entities demand. Yeah gentility in shape or out of shape and fashion turns on a launching half naked no shoes. So true he's brilliant. But you think I hope he's gonna make it past tomorrow he's the drain any season don't really nice Palin really say that we can do things that kinda feel homo erotic but it it's not threatening. Would you amen discretion face. How I had no idea. Like a dumb joke I did my body does it mean again like just in friendly comment you're you're by the way. That's due to Joseph Biden and I was next here I exaggerated there but I really did walk into a bathroom and flare with a guy thinking oh somebody's idea honest and it wasn't kind of. Well you know Jim this is what I've always loved about you is that you know the comedy you've always done. As she just really just is gone to our everybody's mores and said look. You know what I'm gonna make you look in the mirror and really question what to ask is up you know that you're believing in life. And if you think you should be right or wrong and you make us laugh doing it which is such a great way to take a look at some outdated DS it makes it makes the world bad. Let's face it thank you I try to do like I tried to preach the audience played at all I can do is just kind of question why we behave the way we do cause a look I'm full of it too. Half the time I think I'm right about something I'm fund run mile long 50% of the time I've got 500 like every other dope. So I just try to be honest about that and should be his healing here your baseball amendment that average is. An average man yes hi Colin besides obviously the political ideology tiger who Qaeda I mean. Documentary about yeah. That's classic is very good to squeeze that in in 2017 that's I don't know that I can't reference. Actually he failed six out of ten times he's considered the greatest hitter who ever lived so yeah I mean that's just kind of that's the way it is if you if you're right half the time you're doing pretty Iraq. Either way I know you just brought this up I don't know where I saw this name and I wish I get remembered but there's a dude out there with the name Ty Cobb. And you've got everything they did is there does not know the history of psychotic 81 and in your kid tie if your last name is Cobb did it does that's not a nice guy he was not a nice guy. He was not immediately she accomplished something so they may begin may not even know how awful he was couldn't tell the movie came out without Tommy Lee Jones and rob rule I had no idea that he was such an awful nasty do you snooty kind of held that weird and got a lot of singles and immediately rod drove his white and racist but just. Beyond current joke folks yeah. I went closest you're absolutely right just gotten me involved in the mid eighties I guess our and you may lose you didn't take into his twins now. All I'm right angles yeah I love rod through growing up it's weird how you love people. I don't know what it is and make sure like a Yankee fan but you should Iran truly Helmand that had wavered on this like I wanna hang out with this guy I have really weird fantasies about meeting people when I was child. Yeah you know what I love about you could you mean you are the guy that loves taking pictures immediately meet celebrities are you still are you always wore. I will do it but I whether these weird times I'm OK Jeanne have you a lot of people so there are so is okay I'll just like to play Jelena you do that's single I think it was on Saturday. And I I mean I'll see going to be in the front of the plane I hate sitting in the window and and not leave Shriver gets on with his kid bonus ray Donovan right yeah yeah and he's like can I switch to come when my son and I had. Had to say yeah. Anybody else I would have said like look impossible to hate to window and I think a lot I was distraught or do enough. But I mean think look he was used radon and he was also in glengarry Glen Ross and want to actually I got to do it. I didn't talk to him I guess I was getting off the plane was right behind me I wanted to come and I'd seen him with Alan Alda on Broadway. But am I this kid you'll be polite but who cares who kilowatt mobile. Where's this conversation and got you agree with you are not ha ha thanks man now it's fun OK good day Cutera. Those conversations which something in my eyes yeah. Don't you think I see this I would think you're in the business to a little idea what could be a little different is Stevie if you won the business and and he not know you're in the business. But do you think they have a different response if you go hey dude I just want to know I'm into business too and I just love you before all day looking and a sailor operatives who says hey I'm in the business still I don't know I just like it's in India site are okay you're not just gonna try to thus you know ya gonna try to hotly for something. You're actually legitimately you know is about are you know every. Just as bad life here I would never say Pakistan if I had to tell them that I haven't done enough. But I think it's funny because you never know if they know like I've interviewed a lot of people. Who never find any you know command it's an actor like whoever it is and that's the end of their eyes were saying divide and I do love you stand up. When I had no indication they didn't mention during the interview they didn't tell when they walked and just go ahead hello hello. You do zero indication. As the union nice compliment at all man I really enjoyed you in this of that at the end so I never know if people can tell are not good. I think you're not. Put you on the level as leisurely a driver and I know I know I thought I know he's still got no but I mean. For what you would do and why and what you do when your entertainment craft and what he does you guys I think you're on the same level and that's a compliment to both of you was what I say. You know as far as the actor and being a celebrity he's on one level. On ABM I really good at getting to the airport on time to get tight enough I guess I am I'm very punctual I don't know him from the run like he was in June from two magnanimous -- good data as a going into the Boise will and he narrates a lovely NHL tied documentary type special he has that kind of what got to ride -- right so for me out of emergency centers to listen to him talk I'm uneven and obviously in the show's season he's -- radon in your life would like to show but he's gonna yeah and like Jimmy site and so I didn't see that flew into the place on on Broadway but solely for use things good and -- -- -- -- but -- -- that glengarry Glenn -- solid I was obsessed with -- -- I was dying in the almost 2005. Precise on glengarry Glen Ross and I usually Jeffrey cameras and then. That's a that's some people tremendous Tom were patched by talking about not doing Coke and grabbing coworkers are yeah. Good shot on Broadway. And I couldn't talk more time you know I haven't gotten our business model wannabes and he's got some of them. Yeah I would not happen. Of all time and now I don't know that a lot would simply awesome happens like some of those I don't get to do my guys tomorrow about it right I don't get it appears there was allegations that he was unlike you I have this values it. They don't cocoa is like pinching the high any other female coworker value no the call it the co Digi excitable yeah plus he's just an ordinary looking that's still the confederate flag on the car so all we had visuals here I feel bad for the country's coast our journey to be the show got yank you right. You're absolutely right there was a lot of money and I think I never understood why a lot of the co stars are going to use offensively you're intensely recollect don't understand it will kill everybody and need I can oh my god if I had Bill Cosby money I'd be screaming everyone of those women you know. What right there until they're they're taking it from GAAP to play also put them I just the TMZ story about talk more patent VW saw the engines are allegedly Greg Norman brought that putter he put his finger between her nose and you know first sentence of the sort of remember this now I forgot that it was were in Atlanta when this gal you rides on damned yeah that would have been what honey what do what do you what do you say about that will be got the finger where you -- he got the finger on his tombstone which is a Tom wolf -- dot dot -- he was accurate because. It's from playing that guy has a car when a man what a great drab. I'm looking at a position he's in mission is Ty Cobb events. Moved around and I know it's Donald Trump's attorneys were I saw the name how find out that it is an initial idea and cost. It looks like we'll for Bradley how. Funny is that trumps attorney that's great I'll that is not going to handlebar mustache not just call it going and should not realize you don't want to hire that guy isn't these got a New Orleans no worst guys in history he probably like him for that reason you're probably right you know his gun. Yeah I. You're really good mustache off any good guys like I want a creepy like I got a throwback Trump's lawyer is an old school. So rolled back as soon different time music no doubt about it wasn't happy time. For some Americans are currently that you should be relaxed sort of a deal that I played baseball life blacks couldn't shut up. When they talk about back in 1950 accuses great time to the whole country is segregated it wasn't. I'm Jimmy is a big there's a big guy big thing going on Boston because one of the owners was a super racist and right and they get that street hockey way named after him. And of course Steve you wanna name is Q teriyaki which would be great and if you got as it sounds stupid but how do you make sure Terry added that is a great game now science is so true I remember you know I do you know when I was working Rochus who Wii's we had we had cease a Cecil Fielder pressure filled his dad. And I I was oblivious to this because I was so once you think from Boston and apparently didn't realize racism was visa was sure you know I think people told stupid jokes might not wow what every tell you stupid jokes but if you have a chance to move the ball game much to get the best player right and I remember sister Phyllis I'll never go to Boston and I'm looking man emphasis is in the eighties semite why would you go to wide looks like the idiot. Why would put do you wanna do sure any goes dude do you not know how racist they are over there. And I literally didn't know that that was how it was still bad bad enough that he hears the eighties he would not go because of how he would be treated by its. Team I never knew Boston had a race is your vacation Patrice actually is the wind. Who broke it down really well how race is Boston 10 yeah he had a great take on these responders from my usual rock spirit. So why do you think you'll live somewhere you don't notice but sometimes you very you don't even notice or did you just in your area yet I interacting with people yes you know they're. Treated so I didn't I was six years old and it was a great but I I thought the guys are great players Reggie Smith great center fielder to I think one of the guys that they get on base percentage and let's look back and damn run prevention they were thought it was a much better player than he was given credit for right I had his poster on the wall and everything in my Symbian is such a hard time about this on 67 years old. I know why they were you me a hard time because I would I would argue with them spaced snacks and York U. You're talking about let me tell you why they are now he's got to be delays bad and I do you get older you realize. Almighty god really did eventually why don't like Vijay he can't oppose him because he's in speed posing shirtless is not appropriate for six or more it happens almost. Thought Jim yeah I'm I don't know why it's happened Sunday yeah. Yeah. It's in his bedroom I'm still at number I mean it is really don't know let me just say we're Jimmy did and yet. He's got to Neptune theater tonight 730 show you know what suites wailing if you look if for some reason you're one of the folks that have never heard Jim Norton. This is a great show you probably never seen a show like this before in the beautifully about Jim. Is he never does the material you've seen on TV so mussina Netflix special this is a completely brand new show. And I give Jim credit all time because I cannot believe that you do you have a new show with new material and it's as good as it is and yet that's why thank you one of the best that this is because that's not easy to come up with new mature than generally makes people laugh. Especially when you've shot did you know you can do you refine no one not got a whole new whacked it's your amazing now respect STD. STD and others and ahead. Yeah he these acts presents dot com let arrest letter to the letter GS and George STG presents are or get your tickets again to show is that tonight at the net him I thought I was in there. Somebody mentioned you mentioned Patrice and three text into a neat idea every Patrice O'Neal when Jimmy comes on a dig deep really cooled him I didn't mention Patrice is philosophy on women. And on would or wouldn't it fly these days I what were wouldn't fly this is that another specific I know that loves the young women got a bonus Lazio's among you keep kids summing up you just have to know Patrice is odd and I noticed overall philosophy wise but everybody knows Patrice knows they talked about how like you know when you're kind of via he's had the kindest things always say she's hot and that's terrific I. Nobody is warm he was kind of got psychiatrist without breaking down relationships. And between males and Timothy is actually pretty accurate but there's no way to sum up Patrice is feelings on women using what he's accomplished guy it's did you seek. He still says you say one thing you're don's. And then so the data obviously with a Patrice and I think I've got an old school Don Rickles whose sole life could you do shows are in Lisa Lampanelli. These guys that do that kind of humor. I you humor actually isn't really like that. You know that's wildly you'll get in trouble with anybody in that respect decent people go cheeses recommend I be talking about these things that he talks about but these other guys like to treat. How can you do comedy today like tech is everybody is so thin skinned. That's the beauty amazing once you once you really you achieve mediocrity there's nothing they can go back after a net net net like. You know they they tend not to come after me because it's like I don't really care if they do men and they only go after you thinking they can hurt you and it's a Eagles you can justify what you're saying who cares. Let them collect and get upset that I mean half the time they're being phony and there are set to just call them out there blows off I got accused is I do Kelyn dinner joke. On Twitter and what they mean and nasty joke I'm done very very pro trends obviously. And there are calling trends hold their government to why you're good will must be broken if you think I'm trends hold it because I do a kaelin's energy outlook. They anger and into better it's gotten the anger is gone they move on to. We're on an expert Senseo they're gonna react yeah because that's the thing is it this is his misery loving company is what it is yeah I it is amazing I mean it's like Jack cost against Enron. I it's it's sad it really is is like everybody's butt hurt about everything. People like it's a weird sense of empowerment like you get a tension sick child throws putting on the wall you noticed some and that's what feeling you're getting your feelings heard is now it's it's a way to get attention so weighted get empowered. People who normally don't feel OK I know don't hurt the people come rescue you don't hold your almighty god someone needs the attention. But whatever you're right now I'll be dead soon sell this in the world people are creating did that may never know really benefit them I don't know I don't know Canada my general life. Paris so I was assessing and you know we think that the generation my sister Sissy so we're all right. Oh yes a very good point yet today that the generation always sees the next generation is just a bunch of losers and never figure it out and you did you think we figure out way we used to think that basically got about us you think what it was a real is a maybe he'll be okay. Yeah yeah they never think. And it's kinda humiliating to realize that we didn't have the perfect balance he had no I think should they have the perfect balance. About compassion and reasonableness. We all know why we have the balance and he's the older people or two races in these new kids attitude soft but we. Over fifty we had to write an ethical lawful and that we will have a pass right it's so true yeah. You know I mean if you do a good job as a parent you raise a kid that we'll tell you that you suck I especially because that's where you could say they can they have a better vision I had my vision and now they go yeah you may as great kids now we have our original by the way you're really bad. Well wow yeah I guess you get to say that because you're probably right for you in the world probably could be better than what I thought and debate. When I was a little did she teenager drinking I was fourteen I just I just Sydney Friday speech from Guess Who's Coming to Dinner and I. Father I was so admire my mom I don't know terrible just truly are our lowest round I didn't know that it recognizes his camera because that's my head it's horrible. Horrible. I we've got Ty Cobb right through and cynical audience Pete I know from 1967. This is why I love you comment because you know what you're younger than me like you may be the app is going higher. He shouldn't even be but he still you know he gets in my neighborhood was a lot of these lakes and I love you I can't believe anybody in the fifth usually come in CD player. I'm pleased that I really miss Spencer Tracy and I. Oh my god what am I minorities are they married and telling him swallowing or nine people here coming audiences that. I had news free as seriously it doesn't matter what your age is Jim Norton puts on a great show tonight at the Neptune theatre 730 get those tickets and STG presents dot org. Hey this morning and now nine point nine KI guess tell you.